Cupcake Recipe for Disaster

Last evening, my friend and I were baking, for the first time, for both of us. It wasn’t from scratch, since we had the batter pre-made, but it was still time-consuming and exciting! I had laid out everything that we would need, well almost:

  • the pre-made batter (powdery)
  • a large bowl for mixing
  • a mixer and a wooden spoon
  • 3 cupcake trays of 6 each
  • a cup of water
  • coffee filters
  • cooking spray
  • a plastic Ziploc bag
  • some frosting
  • a tube of icing
  • 2 eggs

(Note: don’t follow our recipe, it will confuse you and your cupcakes may not turn out great)

Our steps were unique; you wouldn’t see them anywhere else:

STEPS:

  1. Preheat the oven to 350°F.
  2. Spray cooking oil into the cupcake trays.
  3. Take the large bowl and pour what you think is half of the pack of batter into it.
  4. Crack the eggs using the rim of the bowl, and watch the yolk plop out.
  5. Add the water and stir well.
  6. Realize that it is too watery and add some more batter into it.
  7. Stir again.
  8. Stare at the cupcake trays and realize that you messed up.
  9. Pour out as much cooking spray from the trays as you can, because you don’t need it.
  10. Place the coffee filters into the cupcake trays.
  11. Arrange the trays on such a way that you can so that you can pour the batter in without dropping any.
  12. Pour batter with the wooden spoon into one of the coffee filters.
  13. Stop and think. Do you need baking soda?
  14. Check the recipe label, and face palm yourself. Turns out you don’t need baking soda, but you were supposed to add half a cup of oil.
  15. Take the one coffee filter you already filled and pour the batter back into the bowl.
  16. Throw away that coffee filter and replace it.
  17. Add what you think is half a cup of oil into the batter.
  18. Stir well.
  19. Resume pouring batter into the trays.
  20. Realize that the wooden spoon is too slow, and take a steel scooper instead. Ah, much better.
  21. Fill each cupcake filter about half, because you know it will rise.
  22. Wear your oven mittens, and open the oven slowly. So hot!!
  23. Place the trays into the oven, and accidentally push one way into the back.
  24. Almost burn yourself trying to reach it.
  25. Once in, close the oven, and set the timer to about 20 minutes.
  26. While you are waiting for the cupcakes to bake, get ready for decorations.
  27. Take the plastic bag and fill it about half the way with the frosting.
  28. Wash some raspberries.
  29. Crumble some Oreos.
  30. Almost cut yourself, trying to cut chocolate.
  31. Check the oven. The cupcakes are almost burned!
  32. Look at the timer, there are still about 7 minutes left.
  33. Ask your mom to help you pull them out because the oven is too hot.
  34. Wait for the cupcakes to cool, and notice how they are so small. Oh well.
  35. Cut a small bit of the corner off of the plastic bag and squeeze out some frosting to decorate.
  36. Squeeze some icing on top from the tube.
  37. Sprinkle some of the crumbled Oreos and chocolates on top.
  38. Add a raspberry as a finishing touch.
  39. Finally, organize them onto two plates and fit the two extras into a bowl each.

Kaboom!

Your under-sized, over-cooked, under-frosted, and over decorated cupcakes are done! Congratulations!

They are still mouth-watering, so you eat two, and end up being too lazy to get up to get a third one.

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